Whether your problem is lack of desire, difficulty with sexual functioning, sexual pain, sexual addiction, anxiety, sexual inhibition, or fear of sexuality altogether, your life growing up as a child in your family may be partly to blame.
Sex Smart: How Your Childhood Shaped Your Sexual Life and What to Do About It,
is recommended by America’s top sexologists as an essential guide for understanding your sexual self and solving your problems.
If you would like to see an annotated model of The Milestones of Sexual Development, click here.
Here is what experts in the field are saying about
gets my highest recommendation. It is an optimistic, empowering guide, and the best book available to assess, confront, and change inhibiting thoughts, feelings and behaviors stemming from family-of-origin issues.”
--Barry W. McCarthy Ph.D.; Professor of Psychology, American University; author of Rekindling Desire, Coping with Erectile Dysfunction; Coping with Premature Ejaculation; and Confronting the Victim Role: Healing From an Abusive Childhood.
is a wonderfully written, clear account of the many factors that shape and influence our sexual selves. Unlike most self-help books, which focus on aspects of sexual performance, Dr. Zoldbrod takes a broad, integrative view. With great skill and warmth, she weaves a tapestry of complex non-sexual events in our past that determine the ways in which we relate sexually. Complemented by rich clinical vignettes, her book will be welcomed by those wishing to understand the nuances and mysteries that contribute to our sexual being.”
--Derek C. Polonsky M.D., Department of Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School; Executive Council Member, Society for Sex Therapy and Research; Author, Talking About Sex
is the book on everything you probably don’t know about why you turned out the way you did sexually--and what to do about it.”
--Arnold Lazarus Ph.D.; Distinguished Professor Emeritus, Rutgers University; co-author of Don’t Believe It for a Minute! and The Sixty-Second Shrink
“Dr. Zoldbrod’s model of sexual development is the best one of its kind I’ve ever seen. This book will be useful not only as a self-help manual, but also as an informative guide for therapists and teachers.”
--Janet Shibley Hyde Ph.D., Professor of Psychology and Evjue-Bascom Professor of Women’s Studies, University of Wisconsin, Madison; author of Understanding Human Sexuality (now in its fifth edition)
is a fine book, dealing with sensitive issues in a forthright and direct manner. I recommend it to my patients.”
--Abe Morgentaler M.D., FACS. Director, Male Infertility and Impotency Program, Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, Harvard Medical School, author, The Male Body and The Viagra Myth
“Dr. Zoldbrod explains with clarity the direct effects of parental overcontrol, violence, and emotional withdrawal, which often exist with addiction, on the sexual development of children.”
--Stefanie Abbott M.A., National Association for Children of Alcoholics; author of
Co-Dependency: A Secondhand Life
isn’t just another book on sexuality... It actually guides people through a personal understanding of who they are sexually... Readers can use this intensive exploration of how parental and social influences impact sexual expression to increase their current level of sexual satisfaction... It is in fact a book best read several times... it is so full of great information. This is one of only a few books I keep available to my clients in the waiting room.”
--Marianne Brandon Ph.D., author of Reclaiming Desire: Four Keys to Finding Your Lost Libido
is the book that I hand to my patients who tell me that they do not recall being sexually abused but who nevertheless feel that "something is wrong with me." The Milestones in Sexual Development model is particularly helpful for patients dealing with sex addiction and co-addiction, because the sexual behaviors that get acted out almost always can be correlated with a failure to successfully negotiate specific milestones. It is an empowering book that encourages people to be in the solution, not in the problem. This is one of the books that I wish that I had written.”
--Ginger Manley APRN BC, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and Diplomate, and Certified Supervisor; Certified Sex Addiction Therapist; Clinical Professor of Nursing, Vanderbilt University Medical Center. Author of numerous papers and presenter of frequent workshops on Sex Addiction and Sexual Health. In addition she has been in private practice of sex therapy in Nashville for more than 20 years
“The exercises offer interesting opportunities for personal growth and increased understanding of one’s sexuality. Must reading for anyone who seeks to expand their sexual horizon.”
--Howard J. Ruppell, Jr. Ed.D., Ph.D.; Past Executive Director, The Society for the Scientific Study of Sex and the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists
“A fresh look at the complexities of the erotic life. Readers will find the exercises at the end of each chapter particularly helpful in changing negative attitudes.”
--David H. Barlow Ph.D.; Director, Sexuality Research and Treatment Program, and Professor of Psychology, Boston University
“Dr. Zoldbrod has an impressive understanding of human development and the complex interplay between sex and context--familial, social, and relational. This is a 'user-friendly' book I would recommend to all clients, gay and straight, since we all lack a healthy understanding of our sexual development, whether all is going well or something is going wrong. Sex Smart
guides us in a warm, accepting and knowledgeable way to a fuller integration of our sexual selves.”
--Claudia Bepko M.S.W.; family therapist and author of The Responsibility Trap and The Heart’s Progress
is the best explanation of sexuality that we have ever encountered. Rather than being just another sexual ‘cookbook,’ it helps readers examine the origins of their inner messages about sexuality, allowing a depth of understanding and healing that we believe is unparalleled in the field.”
--John C. Friel Ph.D., and Linda Friel M.A., licensed psychologists and authors of Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families and An Adult Child’s Guide to What’s Normal
“A valuable resource for anyone who wants to understand and explore the root causes of adult sexual intimacy concerns.”
--Wendy Maltz M.S.W., author of The Sexual Healing Journey and Passionate Hearts
“With a warm and lively style, Dr. Zoldbrod has condensed a wealth of clinical and scholarly material into an engaging, informative book. I recommend that you read Sex Smart
if you’re seeking to understand your feelings and beliefs about sexuality, how these came to be, and how you might go about changing them. Sex Smart
is also a great resource for mental health clinicians. The clinical vignettes, practical exercises, and resource lists add to the value of this wonderful book.”
--James M. Ellison M.D., M.P.H., President, Massachusetts Psychiatric Society, Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School, author, Integrative Treatment of Anxiety Disorders
Originally published in 1998 by New Harbinger Publications. Now published by iUniverse.